Sunday, November 30, 2008

12. Culmination - The Last Hour

They both were so happy to see each other. Sadia seemed to be so much confused and puzzled, not knowing what to say. For a minute, Saqi wondered if she is the same girl who used to talk with him for hours and who has shared so many important things with him. But maybe it was obvious, as it was the first time and she didn’t want to spoil it by saying anything just like that. It’s actually quite difficult to comprehend what she would have been thinking at that moment. She was with a person who meant a lot to her and somehow wanted him to realize the same. As Saqi didn’t know much about that place as it was the first time he had visited, Sadia took him over to some café where they could sit and talk for some time as normal friends would have done. They were yet trying to make themselves comfortable talking to each other. Had they known that, this was the last hour they had, to get to know and talk to each other, they wouldn’t have wasted even a minute doing that. It wasn’t even an hour that they had met, not even an hour of happiness, and the most unexpected thing happened, or may be, the most expected. Guess what ..!!.. It was Sadia’s dad at the café. Saqi just didn’t even notice a person coming inside with such a rant and rave. He was just about to take that next sip of his cappuccino, when Sadia with such an innocent but very much busted voice, said, “Saqi..!!..My dad”. It wasn’t until then that Saqi even looked up. He was just busy with his cup of coffee and contemplating what to say. Saqi turned to his right and her dad stood just towards the middle adjacent right side of the table. Saqi looked up. “Salaam, How are you uncle”, were his first of words. Burning fumes could be smelt and felt around. Uncle-Ji didn’t even reply back, neither did he at least greet Saqi with a w-salaam, nothing; just deep silence. Saqi could comprehend what it’s going to bring. Sadia’s dad asked her to come outside. By the time, Saqi couldn’t think anything so just cleared the café bill and just hoped and prayed that everything should be fine. Sadia came inside and asked Saqi that her dad has called him outside. Saqi, though a little petrified, came outside the café to meet her dad and again he didn’t reply to Saqi and walked towards his car and asked Sadia to tell him to sit inside the car. Sadia was tensed and this was clearly visible on her face. She had somehow stopped her tears but could be easily seen in her eyes.

Saqi knew that there was nothing to get actually worried and as they have not done anything wrong that couldn’t be justified, everything should be fine and this was what he told Sadia at the moment, and so he told her to ask her dad if he wanted to talk to him and why would he simply sit inside in someone’s car who can’t even reply back to him. Saqi too, from inside was a little vexed but as he looked at Sadia, he thought that he has to somehow act strong to at least talk to her dad and clear everything, whatever is in their mind as Sadia would not be able to explain everything to them.

Friday, November 28, 2008

11. The Most Awaited Day

It was early Friday morning and Saqi along with his friend, Mashad, were ready to leave from their place hoping and praying that the trip would be productive for them in every way possible as it was meant to be. It was their morning flight and everything went fine till now, but none knew God’s plans. Though the flight was a little bit delayed, but Alhamdulillah, it was a safe and pleasant journey till Sadia’s place. She was eagerly waiting at the airport. Amidst all crowds, she could easily be seen. Dressed in a shalwar kameez with a dupatta, she looked quite different from others; a little bit confused and baffled, but then that was obvious on her part. “Salaam”, were her first of words and both felt really good to meet each other, though none of them knew what to talk apart from normal hi-hello, despite the fact that they both used to talk for hours on the phone. “Imagine it’s the same feeling as you would get if you have a pen-friend with whom you are in contact for quite a long time and have exchanged and shared your personal views on various important matters of life, with whom you can really dare to be yourself, and now somehow with God’s will, you are getting a chance to meet each other and finally you both make it”.

Mashad had to meet his other friend so he went to see him and both of them decided that they would meet in office during early evening as it was quite far away from the city and as Saqi & Sadia were meeting for the first time, so they should also spend some time talking and getting to know each other in person as normal friends do. Saqi wanted to finish official work and training as fast as possible else Sadia would feel that he actually came here for official purpose and he didn’t even bother spending quality time with the person with whom he used to talk for hours. Moreover, Saqi didn’t even tell Sadia about his work so she knew that he was there just for her. All Saqi knew was that he would finish his work in a day and then he would make her sit patiently and understand everything what he always wanted to, but couldn’t ever do over the phone. He was sure that as they both respect each other so much, it would be all fine when he would tell her that they should keep their relationship limited to a good and respectful friendship. He had prayed so much for that and really looked forward to the time when he would do that, the time which didn’t now seem to be so far away as it used to. But who knew, what had destiny decided for them.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

10. Saqi's Conception

Saqi, on the other hand thought that in this trip, he would explain Sadia, that the way she thinks things are, may be, would not be productive in the long run and that she should also start to see Saqi as a good friend. There were several reasons for that and Saqi also never found it appropriate to discuss such important stuffs over the phone. The way she used to talk with him, this was all most impossible to make her explain and comprehend. He thought and was sure that when they both meet, it would be easy to make her understand things and he would manage everything and wouldn’t let her feel bad in any way. Don’t know, he just didn’t want to hurt her in any way and found that time to be most appropriate to tell her, when they both would be together. He knew this would be difficult, but somehow he had a hope that he would set everything right around her by properly and politely making her understand everything and he was sure that Sadia, in the end would understand everything and respect it. Saqi’s intensions were good and pure and all he could think was to speak the truth in front of her. All he prayed to God was to make it easy for Sadia and to just set everything right around her. Saqi too somewhere was scared as he didn’t want to lose Sadia as a good friend and couldn’t think what would be there relationship status after he tells everything to Sadia. But truth is truth and impossible often the untried; so keeping faith in God, he really looked forward to meet her till the most unexpected day came.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

9. Coincidences

It was a co-incidence that Saqi and his friend, Mashad got some work from office and had a one-day official training in the Development Center of their office branch located near to Sadia’s place. So obviously, Saqi was happy in a way that he would get to see a person whom he knows now for quite a long period of time and who has shared so many important things about her with him; a person for whom Saqi meant a lot and who has really dared to share everything personal about her life without ever seeing him in person, which he really respected. He found this official tour as a blessing in disguise because whenever Sadia used to ask him to at least come once and meet her; he was compelled to think of some reason or the other to make her forget this topic for the time being which used to result in her getting angry over him. Then Saqi was left with no option but to tell her just like that he would try to come but he somewhere knew that he hardly would ever get a chance to meet her but couldn’t ever tell her directly. That innocent voice used to be so much full of expectations that it just used to cease Saqi’s lips from saying anything that would upset her. Even Saqi wasn’t sure that he would ever meet her or not, so just saying anything pessimistic or cynical at this point was just not justified. On the other hand, her friends used to tell her that it’s her imprudence if she feels that a person to whom she just talks over the phone and hasn’t ever met, would actually come someday in real to meet her. They used to make fun of her, as to how she trusted someone by just talking over the phone, that she shared everything personal with him and how she could trust that he would ever come to meet her. So Saqi’s coming there to meet Sadia actually meant a lot to her in many ways and when he gave her the news that he would be coming there; for her, it was a moment to be treasured. Her happiness couldn’t be explained through words; it could only be felt.

 

A greater co-incidence was that Sadia’s birthday was falling in between at the same time when Saqi’s official trip was planned. Don’t know what God had planned. Saqi didn’t tell her that it’s his official trip and that apart from meeting her, he has a training planned and some official work too. But it was in his mind that when they would meet at her place, he would tell her that he would be a little busy with official work also and he knew that shouldn’t be a problem. It was her birthday in between, and they planned a lot many things for that. She hardly ever used to celebrate it, so this time Saqi thought that as he would also be there, so they would be having a great celebration and also he would get a chance to meet her close ones. Sadia was beyond happy and this was reflected now in their every talk. She just couldn’t express how happy she really was. She was getting prepared to see a person with whom she has talked for so long and shared so many important things of her life. She just wanted to be at her best when she meets him.

8. The Meeting Hope

Sadia wanted Saqi to at least visit her place sometime and meet her once so that they would get to know each other better and also because every time Saqi used to tell that how could they decide anything without even seeing each other in person. Saqi’s home was quite far away from his working place. Whenever once or twice in a year, he visited home, all his spare leaves used to get over with that. So his visiting Sadia’s place was actually beyond question as he hardly used to have any leave left which he would utilize for anything else or to visit her. His office schedules were so hectic that he had to even compensate hours for talking to her on phone, which he never told her only because he didn’t want Sadia to realize this in any way. Sadia was a very understanding girl and really cared for him; had he told her that he has to sit extra hours for work because of the time spent talking to her on the phone, she would have cut short her talks and wouldn’t have felt like talking and explaining all things which otherwise she felt sharing with him. She already had so many problems regarding her family and other things that he just didn’t want to add anything to it because of him. Saqi thought that it would be selfishness on his part if he told her that he really gets tired and hardly gets time to talk due to his work. He thought that at least this girl feels free speaking her heart out in front of him and his telling her these things would result in her being reluctant to talk to him. All Saqi wanted was to see her happy in every way possible and he used to do everything possible that would keep her happy.

Monday, November 24, 2008

7. Getting Along Thoughts

Sadia's every talk now used to be full of commitment while Saqi always asked her to be friends and that he always saw and sees her as a good friend which she would over hear every time. And she was so much innocent and polite in her talks that Saqi just couldn’t tell her anything rudely or straight that would just break her. He thought that maybe she is a little young at her age to decide these things and with course of time everything would be fine.

Days passed and their relationship kept strengthening. Inspite of Saqi's busy schedule and work at office, they used to talk for hours. Sadia used to tell him every bit of her day, while Saqi used to patiently listen to all strange things that used to happen around her. Right from the morning fight with parents to evening fight between them, from their parents cursing her, - to - their feeding her younger sister's ears against her, Sadia used to tell him everything that her parents used to do each day to make her life miserable knowingly or unknowingly. Even Saqi used to feel helpless at times as to what he can really do to set things right around her. All he could think was to listen patiently and talk to her so that she would feel important and try to solve her problems in every way possible apart from praying for her well being.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

6. The Quandary

Whenever Saqi, sometimes earlier just to see her mom's reaction, used to tell her, what if he has seen a girl for himself who is really good, she would appreciate it but with that she would say that at least see a family that is compatible with theirs. At Saqi's native place, much stress was given to the family as there, it was said that, “it’s not a relation between just two people; it is a relation between two families. So for a future healthy relationship, it’s very important that there should be a family compatibility.” His parents used to tell him that he is free to decide good for himself but to just see if it’s a religious sober family as theirs and used to say that they had full faith on their son that he wouldn’t ever do anything that would let his family down. All these words used to keep revolving around him which couldn’t let him take any firm decision. On one hand he used to think as to why Sadia would suffer because of her family and that she deserves nothing but the best, and on the other hand his parent's words and expectations for him couldn’t let him decide anything as of now. So Saqi could not commit anything to Sadia because he was not sure of what destiny would have decided and doesn’t want Sadia to suffer at a later point of time. He just couldn’t even think of lying to her. Saqi always thought and wanted the best for Sadia.

5. Saqi's Kin

Saqi came from quite a religious family. His parents were of utmost importance to him. He just couldn't comprehend the fact that he would ever do anything that would go against them. Saqi's parents were just like anyone would ever dream of. Always supportive and caring, they had done everything possible to make him get to a position where he is today. Everything that Saqi was as a person, it was all because of the values, love, care and support of his family. They had fulfilled his every need, whether big or small, right from his childhood till he was in a position to earn by himself. So, now when Saqi could stand on his own feet, he did not want to tell his parents anything that would upset them or make them feel that now as their son is independently living, he doesn’t care about what his parents want for him. So every time Saqi used to contemplate if he should tell about Sadia to his parents.  Sadia, as a person was perfect, loving, caring and she could do anything for Saqi as she always used to say. But her family was what used to take a toll on Saqi. They were just not compatible. Imagine a family where father still sometimes beats his kids for no reason and does not give a damn about his responsibilities towards his family.

4. Sadia & Saqi

Sadia was just an ideal kind of girl; gorgeous, beauty with brains. She was the best in whatever she did; whether it was her college work or managing all household activities. Understanding, intelligent, down to earth, the girl who would really love and respect dedicatedly from the bottom of her heart. Her talks used to be so innocent and natural. Don’t know why, how, where and what happened so unexpectedly.

Saqi was a smart, humorous, fun-loving boy; always happy and contented with what he had and life used to keep getting better for him. A responsible and God-fearing boy, his family meant the world to him. Sadia meant a lot to him too. He could not even think of any act that would disturb her. He always thought good for her and prayed for well-being of her and her family.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

3. The Mysterious Home

Sadia’s home was not what a normal person would call as a home. There were loads of problems around this innocent girl and there was none at her home with whom she can really discuss her matters or give her such kind of love. She always used to tell Saqi to take her away from hell, what she referred as her home. Don’t know, her parent’s behavior towards her was worse than what one would expect even from step-parents. There family had met with some tragedy long time back and they somehow held her responsible for that without any reason. God knows, in what world they used to live in. And she doesn’t use to share a healthy friendship with any of her friends. Saqi always used to think that why she being such a nice and kind-hearted person does not have any of good friend around. All she used to tell him is that she does not want anything in life. She does not have much expectations. Just give her a shoulder to cry. Just talk to her so she does not feel left out from this world. And with course of time he too realized that her parents are really not understanding at all. They would make her plead for pennies. She had to literally beg in front of her father to get currency in her phone or to at least buy her basic stuffs needed for a girl of her age. They didn’t recharge her phone so that she couldn’t get in touch with anyone on phone. She had to give an account of every minute spent outside her house. Everything around her was so inexplicable and mystifying.

All the time Sadia just used to tell him that at least you stay there and talk to her at least on the phone, so it was Saqi mostly who would call her every time they needed to talk. Her family was not much religious and her father hardly ever used to offer salah except for the Friday prayers. To be honest, even that was skeptical. Neither did their family share healthy relations with their neighbours nor even with their relatives. They did not even share a healthy relationship amongst themselves so relatives and neighbours were beyond question. Initially Sadia was also not that much religious but that was obvious because of the aura around her. So Saqi usually used to tell her about religion and to start praying and ask God to set everything right around her. So he made her promise that she would never skip any Salah and mostly he used to tell her its importance and the way to lead a life as taught by their religion. And with course of time Sadia became regular with Salah and now knew a lot many things about her religion and how to lead a life as per that, but still every time after the religious and other talks, Sadia used to give him a hint towards her feelings for him. Saqi, on the other hand, still was not comfortable with that and wanted to keep it just limited to a friendship and tried to slowly cut short his talks. But then the feeling that this friendly-relationship is productive in a way that at least a girl who did not know much about her religion now really cares offering salah and is now particular about it that she does not skip any of them in future, kept him talking to her. He felt that at least he should keep talking to her till she gets regular with salah and really start to comprehend that this is not for him but for God. Sadia used to pray daily now and ask God to set things right around her, and she used to feel that God has sent Saqi as a person listening to her prayers and he would set all things right around her.

But her family was just not happy with her changing behavior. Don’t know why they could not see her happy. Her father used to get angry over her for offering prayers and used to tell her not to waste her time doing that. Her parents always used to have quarrels between them for every topic whether big or small and this used to take a toll on Sadia. They even did not let her sit and talk to her younger sister who was now in her 2nd standard. So all Sadia was left with, were the walls of her house to talk with. Neither she used to get any pocket money to meet her small needs nor did she use to have a balance in her phone so that she could at least call and talk to somebody whenever she felt lonely. They had just made her life miserable to live. With such conditions around her, she used to see Saqi as a savior who would just come one day and take her out of this hell, where she was made to suffer each moment of her life. So as days passed, her possessiveness towards Saqi started increasing.

Saqi felt that this is the reason of her loving him so much in such a short period of time. Saqi used to patiently listen to her problems whether big or small and really used to feel very bad that such a sweet girl has so many problems around her. All he could do was to pray for her and her family that things become fine for all of them and asked her to do the same. But this was not all what Sadia wanted. She wanted to see a Saqi, committed to her, though she did not say that but she wanted to know whether Saqi really loved her or not. Saqi, on the other hand, respected her a lot and could not think to speak anything that would hurt her feelings. He used to think that this girl has so many problems around her and if he speaks something of which he himself would not be sure, that would just break her heart. He used to think and pray for a day when everything around Sadia would be fine. He thought that the reason for Sadia to love him so much at this time is obvious as she gets a person who listens to her problems and tries to solve it and prays for her well-being. She gets a person to speak her heart-out, everything that she used to keep within herself and wanted to speak to anyone close to her. She found Saqi as a person in front of whom she can cry and feel lighter and who would really take care of her. So Saqi felt that they both should give this relationship some more time and wouldn’t think about commitment matters least till Sadia’s studies get over. He just could not think of anything that would upset this sweet girl who just has started to offer salah and started feeling things around her better.

Every time he thought to speak anything that would go against what Sadia wants, something stopped him as he thought this would really upset this girl who has just started to see world with a much better perspective, who has just started to learn about her religion because of him, who has just started to love things around her because of him.

2. Feelings Upside-Down

Saqi always saw a good friend in her while with course of time, Sadia started to love him. Initially Saqi did not even understand the implied meaning of her talks and changed behavior, mostly because he used to remain quite busy with his office work and couldn’t understand that how a girl whom he knows just for a week or two, could even have such type of feelings for him. Initially Sadia also didn't express anything but this thing that Saqi really cannot understand the implied meaning of her talks, used to irritate her and she often used to get angry over him for not giving time to understand her. But for Saqi the truth was that he always looked at her as a very good friend and wanted her to reciprocate the same, which Sadia always hated. Most of the times, they fought over the same issue. Whenever Sadia used to tell him that can she tell one important thing to him, Saqi used to say, "a bomb is awaited ;)" and used to ask her something different that would just divert the topic for the time being. This helped for a month after which things really used to get worse if Saqi did not respond positively to her serious talks. And finally one day Sadia clearly told Saqi that she has got feelings for him and that she really loved him from the bottom of her heart, and asked him if he feels the same. Her voice had such expectations and hope within, that compelled Saqi not to deny anything. But he really did not want to make a commitment at this time as he considered that it’s not an appropriate age for these things. Sadia was in 3rd year of her bachelor’s degree course and Saqi had just got over from his degree and worked in a software company as a web designer. He felt that may be this is childish on her part to commit such an important decision of her life at this age, when studies and many other things should have been at a higher priority for her. They have not ever met once, so Saqi used to tell her that she should give this relationship some more time so that they both would get to know each other better and they can be friends at least for the time being, and that they would later see if her feelings would remain the same over the course of time. Saqi used to think that how can a girl fall in love with him without even seeing him in person. He just did not want to give her false commitment or lie to her in any way that would break her heart later. So he always used to tell her that let us stay as good friends, but Sadia always used to over-hear this part. Many times she got angry only listening to the fact that Saqi considers her just as a good friend. She just couldn’t comprehend the fact that Saqi does not have any such feelings for her.

Friday, November 21, 2008

1. Opening Impressions

It was a Sunday evening and as usual Saqi was busy with his coding practices. Just to take a break amidst, while browsing that night, he came through this profile of a girl named Syed Sadia. He still asks this question to himself as to why he sent a friend request to her; may be he loved that name. But to be really honest, he still does not know, mostly because Saqi was not a kind of person who would squander his time browsing to someone’s profile and then asking for a friendship. But after all what has to happen, happens. So Saqi, not even waiting or expecting any reply, got along with his usual mundane chores that used to keep him quite busy and contented. It was the coming Friday evening and the day was really hectic for Saqi. It was closing time of a project so he usually used to return late from office. It was that night, when he saw a reply from Sadia, a simple "hi" and complimenting some pictures of his native place in his profile. So things kind of started to get along for both of them right from the beginning. Scrapping started between them and Sadia seemed to be a nice girl to him. Just after a day, both started chating and mostly it used to get along for hours and both started to get to know each other. Both exchanged their pics and Sadia though really worried and hoping that this guy would keep her pics safe, even messaged him once that she has full faith in him and she trusted that he would keep her pics safe. She was such an innocent girl. Sadia was really a beautiful girl and both loved to chat with each other. She sometimes used to pick some strange topics about country matters and world-wide terrorism and asked Saqi to give his view on the same, though in real she was not a kind of person who actually cared for that. Later she told Saqi that her friends asked her to check his views on these matters so that they would get to know his personal views or if his thoughts are biased towards some particular thing. Still don’t know what was in their mind or what they wanted to figure out with that. Saqi was not the kind of person who would let himself get involved in such talks but then he had to speak something now when he was asked to. He found explaining such stuffs to her a little difficult through chats, so he asked for her mobile number and called her. Ahh..!! Her sweet voice was like a ten year old kid and as she was a little scared to begin, Saqi tried to make her as comfortable on phone as possible. It could be easily figured out that even she was not a kind of person who would really like to talk about such matters or even cared for these things and that someone has really compelled her to ask for this. Her initial say hearing to Saqi's voice was that he is a rude type of boy with arrogance and attitude which however turned to be quite different later, but that is a different part of the story. There was some kind of pureness in her voice that kept Saqi talking to her and of course with the course of time, she too loved talking to him.