Saturday, December 20, 2008

Author's Message & Gratitude

In your life, you often come across some beautiful people who leave an impact in your life and really mean a lot to you and then you share a revered relationship with them. Even if they are not with you any more or you cannot take those relationships a leap ahead due to some reasons, still you feel that it’s worth to make those revered relationships unforgettable and a part of your life. Sadia’s Saqi is one such respectable effort. 

There are times when you happily talk to your near & dear ones. It’s never a big deal to have pleasant talks and understand them without even questioning about anything in the times when everything in your relationship is going all right. The real test of any relationship, whether friendship, love, marital or any other is when things don’t get along as expected and there are some misunderstandings in between. It’s this time when your trust and faith towards your relationship is put to test. A successful relationship is the one that overcomes even those hard times of misunderstandings. The depth of your love towards the other in such times gets reflected, when going beyond your esteem and ego, you try to understand the other person and make it a point to sort out things as soon as possible. Such hard times are just to make you realize the importance of other person, whether it be your friend, spouse etc., in your life.  You should optimistically take it as a blessing in disguise as it made you feel and realize the importance of your relationship and so you should try to get over those times as soon as possible. Just think over the times in your relationship, when things used to get along in the best way possible; the time you would have thought that you would never stop talking and misunderstand the other person whatever may be the condition. There are no egos in relationship that would make you think that why would you be the one to take the first step and talk to the other person; instead, he/she should come and sort out things, if he/she wants. Remember, your relationship is not a business that you would either think, that last time, it was you to have sorted out things and this time the other person should take the step, if he/she wants. This ego just kills the relationship. Rather you should be proud of yourself if every time you make it a point to sort out all misunderstandings in order to make your relationship alive again and take it a leap ahead.

I am really sorry if “Sadia’s Saqi” offended or aggravated anyone’s feeling or if any one got hurt in any way while the course of reading. Believe me, really, it was not written to offend or hurt anyone in any way. It also gives me immense pleasure to thank “Sadia” & “Saqi” – the names, as they helped me truthfully emote myself the way I wanted. And of course I would like to thank all the followers of “Sadia’s Saqi”, especially Dina, Lena, Huda, Saima, Poonam, Laiqa, Qurat, Safita, Dona, Jawed, BigB and all other readers. I am sorry if I missed out on any name. To be honest, without your support and encouragement, this would not have been possible at all. I just wanted to see different insights and how everyone whose responses, concern and comments really mean a lot to me, react and perceive things differently. Sometimes with a suggestion, sometimes with comments, sometimes your avid and wait for more to come in next posts, sometimes appreciations, sometimes your inclination towards Saqi’s character and sometimes towards Sadia, you all did the most that was possible from your side to make it better and encourage me to improvise and write more. Sincerely, I was overwhelmed with gratitude for your help and support. I had in mind that this would get extended to around 17-20 chapters, but I had written only 10 when I started posting it. I thought none would get time to even read it and it’s no point emoting and expressing myself here. It was all due to your sincere comments and support that encouraged me to write its remaining part and as now I have all most finished it, I wish I could give it a happy end to at least meet up to the expectations of my readers and finally make all of them smile. I am really sorry for that; Shuhab just couldn’t do it, had he given it a happy end for now, this wouldn’t have remained a truth anymore. But at the same time I must say that this is not the end. It’s said that everything is fine in the end; if it’s not fine, then it is not the end. So just hope for the best.


I think that there are times when none is wrong. Everyone seems to be right in their own way. Everyone has their own set of reasons and apt justifications which at that point of time seem to be pertinent for them, and you can’t question or blame them in any way. I guess, may be, its conditions at those times which are just skewed and not in anyone’s favor and you really can’t do anything, but to see them happen and just be ready to expect the unexpected. And you never know what God has set out for you.

HE is the one with all knowledge of the unseen and HE is the one to decide your destiny. I would like to quote here words from Allama Sir Mohammed Iqbal, which say;


faanoos bankay jiski hifaazat hawa karey …..

woh shamma kya bhujeygi, jisse roshan Khuda karey


Time has always proved that HE is always just in HIS every decision. May be at the moment you would feel that it was injustice towards you, but with the course of time you get to know that what HE decided was actually the best for you in some way or the other. All you have to do is to be patient and have faith in God. HIS decisions are always the best and HE would surely set all things right around everyone.


Lastly, before I finish, I sincerely thank you all once again from the bottom of my heart for your kind support and encouragement to make “Sadia’s Saqi” possible. May God bless you all.

Khuda Hafiz.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

19. Concern, Hope & Faith

Saqi just doesn’t want to blame Sadia for anything that happened. She still is the best and deserves the best. Even not talking to Saqi is her choice, and as a good friend, he should respect that. The concern now is nothing but Sadia. Hope she is good. Hope she is leading her life in the best way possible without having any regret of what happened in the past. Hope she has started to look for the best in her future. Hope she now has lot of good friends around her, better than Saqi, who would think the best for her and she really dares to be herself with them. Hope her parents now at least make an effort to understand their daughter better and give her share of love to her. Saqi doesn’t know anything. He has lost every contact with his loving friend or anyone close to her who could have helped him get his friend back or at least give him any news of her well being. He just knows that he always thought and wished the best for his friend, still thinks the same and would be doing the same in future. He couldn’t think of doing anything for her now but least he could do is to pray for good health of her and her family and that she remains happy in whatever she does and wherever she is. He has all faith in Almighty Allah that HE surely would have planned the best for Sadia which none knows except HIM and Inshallah, all the best of things would be coming her way soon.

Monday, December 15, 2008

18. The Regret

The only thing Saqi regretted as he stepped outside and walked along was that he couldn’t make Sadia understand things the right way as he would have done, had this unexpected event not happened. And there would have been loads of questions in her mind too, which due to this awful game of time, left unanswered. The regret was that even Sadia started to blame Saqi for everything that happened. Without even asking anything, all blames were put on Saqi for no reason. It was all right for others to have reacted in whatever way they wanted as they didn’t know Saqi as a person; but it really shocked Saqi, that even Sadia, knowing everything, too reacted against him after that incident and told Saqi to never contact her again. Saqi couldn’t even speak a word to her. It was the most unexpected thing for him that Sadia would react in such a way. He couldn’t comprehend as to what he did to have hated by her like that. There could have been hundreds of reasons but then Saqi thought that he should respect it if she doesn’t want to talk to him. There was no point to compel Sadia to listen that every word he spoke was truth if she really was not ready to keep up their friendship. Moreover she very well knew Saqi as a person, so she herself should have understood the situation and the reason for Saqi to react that way at that moment of time. And even if she didn’t understand, she didn’t find it important to have at least talked about it even once and tried to sort out things. But what has to happen, happens; and everything that happens is for our own good. So taking this thought, he too didn’t mind if Sadia doesn’t want to talk to him or keep up their friendship if she is happy that way. All Saqi wanted was the best for her and to always see her happy, so he thought that let it be the way she wanted. But then that loss of such a respected and revered friendship really used to hurt him badly. He just wanted to speak out everything to at least ease out his heart. So he found it best to express himself this way.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

17. Last Steps

It was early evening by now and Saqi was supposed to leave for his office. Moreover, Saqi thought it would be better to leave the place before he loses patience. He wanted to clear loads of things with Sadia but the situation and condition would not have allowed that. Neither was she in a condition to understand anything at this time, nor was it appropriate to talk to her in front of all of them. The agony and pain she was going through at the moment was all getting reflected through her heavy breaths and tears which she couldn’t stop. Saqi just felt helpless to have done anything for Sadia at the moment. The condition just didn’t allow that. Without even trying to understand, they disagreed to every word that Saqi said. All the time they kept saying that they knew everything and not to say a word in front of them. On the other hand they asked to answer their questions. Don’t know how that could have been possible. He just couldn’t take it anymore. Their every word was full of hatred for Saqi. He thought, what they actually want to know if they already know everything. He just wished that by some miracle, if someone would make them understand the right things in an apt manner. Their skepticism, raised voices and the unusual way in which they comprehended things made Saqi feel that it was actually pointless to break head in front of them.

Within, Saqi thought that there are times when you can’t actually do anything even though you try your best to; in those times you should leave everything to God and let HIM decide the best for everyone. So taking this thought along, saying “Khuda-Hafiz” to everyone, he walked towards the main entrance door. Sadia’s eyes were getting blood red with satiated tears. She was just inconsolable and as Saqi started to leave the place, he too just couldn’t stop his tears. It was obvious as none of them would have ever even dreamt that their friendship would get ended this way. Saqi just asked himself as to what awful did he do to anyone to get hated by someone like this. He prayed to God to make it easy for Sadia once he leaves; and to give her strength to deal with the situation and most of all, her parents. He just asked God to show them the right path and increase their center to let them comprehend things the right way. That’s all he found appropriate at the moment to have done that was under his control. He thought that let God decide the best for everyone and hoped that a day would come when the conditions would make up everything again as they had broken it for now. Time is the best healer so let the conditions take their time to set the right time.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

16. The Pinnacle

Saqi just wished, had God given him a day’s time to have explained everything to Sadia which he already would have, had this unexpected incident not happened. He was already prepared to explain and make Sadia comprehend everything and he was sure that she would understand everything as Saqi’s words always meant a lot to her and she aptly knew that he would not decide anything which would not be in her favor. Saqi was sure that she would respect the fact that he takes her as a good friend and they both would always share a reverent friendship. He just couldn’t comprehend that it would all get ended so fast. As time passed, their blames over Saqi started to reach its pinnacle. His silence had already started to take a toll on him. They even didn’t refrain themselves from saying that they knew what were his real intensions to come there. They were just not ready to listen anything. This was a blame which Saqi just couldn’t take on himself. Without knowing anything and not making any sincere effort to know anything, how could they have commented like that. It was a real test of patience for Saqi and all he found that how true was Sadia in her words when she described her kin. They didn’t even feel a bit of shame to have doubted their daughter’s character. So Saqi thought what would be his existence in front of them. When they are not responsible towards their daughter, with what hope he could even think that they would listen to his words. It was just hopeless to make them understand. Saqi just asked God to give him strength and patience to listen to their every allegation, however awful it would get. He just didn’t care now as to what would they feel. All he prayed was to make it easy for Sadia once he leaves. He knew it is not going to be easy for that innocent girl who just couldn’t stop crying, hearing to this smudged conversation.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

15. Conversations Reaching Apex

And with the course of time, conversations just started to reach towards apex. Every one sitting there was so much elder. Saqi thought whatever they did and said, at the end they were Sadia’s parents and he was supposed to respect that. He talked with them with the same politeness and respect as he would have talked with his own parents. He thought as to how and what should he say that would at least make them realize how their behavior towards their daughter has just made her life ominous and at the same time thought the impact his words would make on them. He thought that if they didn’t understand what he would try to make them comprehend, it would just make their feelings harsh towards their daughter. These all things kept revolving around his mind and he decided not to speak a word of it as it would really make it a lot more difficult for Sadia later. She would lose whatever share of love she had from her parents and that would make her survival even more miserable there. Saqi, as a good friend didn’t mind taking it on him as far as it would be productive for Sadia in the long run. He had to speak the truth and so he told them that they both were friends, at least that is what Saqi always considered it to be. It was just a very respectful friendship and he always wanted Sadia to respect that.

To be honest, he himself felt uncomfortable to say all that what Sadia used to tell him about her kin. He thought when her parents couldn’t listen and understand their daughter in so many years, what and how would they understand a person whom they know for just an hour and why would they trust him. There was no reason for them to have trusted Saqi and actually they didn’t as was getting reflected from their part of conversation. But Saqi had faith and knew that at least God knew that he hasn’t done anything wrong for which he actually should feel guilty and this was what gave him strength to move along. So it doesn’t actually matter what her parents think and whether they trust him or not. Even Sadia very well knew that Saqi was right in every word he spoke. She just couldn’t take him as a friend and none can ever blame her for that. So when Saqi told her parents that it’s just a good friendship between them, she just couldn’t take it. She was just tears. But this was what Saqi always used to say her also whenever they spoke on phone and so he felt that it’s best to speak truth at the moment. Though strange, but with course of time, he expected everything would be fine. Saqi felt that if not other things, but it was quite important for all of them to know that they just share a good friendship and there was nothing as such what all of them seemed to have thought. And as expected, instead of being supportive and making her feel comfortable, they all embarrassed and fired her with questions as to why and how did she even dare to think her way.  And amidst all this, all Sadia was left with, were her tears. They just couldn’t comprehend what she would be going through, what would be her state of mind at the moment and how asking her such kind of questions would impact her.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

14. The Infuriated Conversation

As they stepped inside and walked from entrance towards the lobby, it was absolute silence. Her mother came forward and Saqi greeted her with “Salaam” and she asked him to sit and if he would like to have something. In the mean while, her aunt came with a glass of water and offered it to him. He was really thankful to her as he felt calmed down after drinking that. Within a minute, there were around four people apart from Sadia who sat opposite to him. It was her parents, her aunt and some cousin brother. Saqi could easily smell the fumes coming from their every word. In that state of nervousness, Saqi prayed to God that if HE was with him, he would manage whatever is awaited, and to just give him strength to deal with all this.

He was really surprised when Sadia’s mom thanked him and said that she knew that it’s mostly because of him that their daughter knows so much about their religion and regularly offers Salah and reads Qur’an. Saqi thought from inside that he wished if she also knew that this was his basic intension of talking to their daughter and there was nothing that they all seemed to be thinking. And as expected, came their next set of questions which was most awaited. They wanted to know if there is anything going on between Sadia & Saqi. If not, then what is the reason that they talk for so long and why he was there. In a way it was justified and obvious on their part to have asked that. How would they know that Saqi’s official DC branch is located there and he was there priory for some official work. They would have just seen their daughter talk to a person and would hardly know much about him. So it was justified on their part to have reacted that way.  

It was actually quite easy to answer to their every question as all Saqi had to do was to speak just the truth and everything would have been fine. But fine for whom; just for Saqi, which he never wanted. What about Sadia..? ..Sadia was just tears at the moment. She just couldn’t stop them. So Saqi thought it would be better if he doesn’t speak anything. His keeping silent would let all of them feel that he was guilty but at least it would save Sadia from hundreds of questions and torture that she would go through after Saqi would leave. He didn’t want to ruin anything and as always wanted the best for his friend.

But keeping absolutely silent was also not possible. Of course he had to speak something and answer their questions. So Saqi thought that instead of losing temper, it would be best to speak least possible and to just speak the truth. Each time he looked at that innocent girl crying, it stopped Saqi from saying anything. He remembered what Sadia used to say. Without any reason, she had to go through so much in her home. Imagine if Saqi would have spoken everything why he used to talk with her and the condition when he started to talk with her. How they all knowingly or unknowingly had made that innocent girl’s life miserable.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

13. Moving Towards Hell

Saqi thought that he should leave the place as her dad wasn’t even ready to talk but then thought it would be really hard for Sadia to deal with it alone and that he should also respect that the aged person standing next is her father, though he didn’t talk to him. Moreover, the thought that their intentions were pure and there was actually nothing of which they should have felt sorry, gave strength to Saqi and he agreed to sit inside the car and they moved towards Sadia’s home. As car’s speedometer crossed about 100 km/hr but still under control, but what wasn’t under control were Sadia’s tears. She just couldn’t stop them. There wasn’t much Saqi could have done as firstly he was now with a much elderly person and moreover he was Sadia’s dad, so Saqi was supposed to talk politely with as much respect as possible. All Saqi could think and do at the moment was to pray to God that everything should be fine. Though her dad didn’t say a word, but his annoyance and rage was getting reflected by the way car was being driven. In the mean while, Saqi got a call from his colleague who asked if he reached safely and when can they start with their official work. Saqi, though not very sure now, told him that he would reach office by early evening and they can start with the work. “Where do you have to go”, asked her dad. So Saqi, thanking God, that at least her dad took the onus to ask something, told him that he has some official work and should reach office by evening. Saqi thought that in a way her dad’s behavior was justifiable because he doesn’t know anything. It wouldn’t have been justified if after getting to know everything, he still reacted the same way. Her dad’s reaction seemed quite obvious and of course he had every right to act that way as he was her father. Convincing himself, this was all Saqi kept thinking apart from praying that at least they all should reach safely wherever they are heading towards, till they somehow reached their residence where her mother and some other relatives were already waiting. Imagine the mind state of Saqi; he was being treated as if cops take some criminal from crime area to some interrogation centre and he doesn’t know anything about that place. He was there for the first time and hardly knew anyone there apart from Sadia. Though he didn’t say a word, but prayed to God to give him strength and to control his words and temper so that they would not take a toll on Sadia later. He didn’t know what would they do inside and so he asked God to make him speak what HE considers would go best for Sadia, which none knew except HIM. Before stepping inside, Saqi told Sadia not to cry and keep faith in God; they haven’t done anything to be felt ashamed of and so they should act normal though he himself wasn’t sure of what wrath waited inside.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

12. Culmination - The Last Hour

They both were so happy to see each other. Sadia seemed to be so much confused and puzzled, not knowing what to say. For a minute, Saqi wondered if she is the same girl who used to talk with him for hours and who has shared so many important things with him. But maybe it was obvious, as it was the first time and she didn’t want to spoil it by saying anything just like that. It’s actually quite difficult to comprehend what she would have been thinking at that moment. She was with a person who meant a lot to her and somehow wanted him to realize the same. As Saqi didn’t know much about that place as it was the first time he had visited, Sadia took him over to some café where they could sit and talk for some time as normal friends would have done. They were yet trying to make themselves comfortable talking to each other. Had they known that, this was the last hour they had, to get to know and talk to each other, they wouldn’t have wasted even a minute doing that. It wasn’t even an hour that they had met, not even an hour of happiness, and the most unexpected thing happened, or may be, the most expected. Guess what ..!!.. It was Sadia’s dad at the café. Saqi just didn’t even notice a person coming inside with such a rant and rave. He was just about to take that next sip of his cappuccino, when Sadia with such an innocent but very much busted voice, said, “Saqi..!!..My dad”. It wasn’t until then that Saqi even looked up. He was just busy with his cup of coffee and contemplating what to say. Saqi turned to his right and her dad stood just towards the middle adjacent right side of the table. Saqi looked up. “Salaam, How are you uncle”, were his first of words. Burning fumes could be smelt and felt around. Uncle-Ji didn’t even reply back, neither did he at least greet Saqi with a w-salaam, nothing; just deep silence. Saqi could comprehend what it’s going to bring. Sadia’s dad asked her to come outside. By the time, Saqi couldn’t think anything so just cleared the café bill and just hoped and prayed that everything should be fine. Sadia came inside and asked Saqi that her dad has called him outside. Saqi, though a little petrified, came outside the café to meet her dad and again he didn’t reply to Saqi and walked towards his car and asked Sadia to tell him to sit inside the car. Sadia was tensed and this was clearly visible on her face. She had somehow stopped her tears but could be easily seen in her eyes.

Saqi knew that there was nothing to get actually worried and as they have not done anything wrong that couldn’t be justified, everything should be fine and this was what he told Sadia at the moment, and so he told her to ask her dad if he wanted to talk to him and why would he simply sit inside in someone’s car who can’t even reply back to him. Saqi too, from inside was a little vexed but as he looked at Sadia, he thought that he has to somehow act strong to at least talk to her dad and clear everything, whatever is in their mind as Sadia would not be able to explain everything to them.

Friday, November 28, 2008

11. The Most Awaited Day

It was early Friday morning and Saqi along with his friend, Mashad, were ready to leave from their place hoping and praying that the trip would be productive for them in every way possible as it was meant to be. It was their morning flight and everything went fine till now, but none knew God’s plans. Though the flight was a little bit delayed, but Alhamdulillah, it was a safe and pleasant journey till Sadia’s place. She was eagerly waiting at the airport. Amidst all crowds, she could easily be seen. Dressed in a shalwar kameez with a dupatta, she looked quite different from others; a little bit confused and baffled, but then that was obvious on her part. “Salaam”, were her first of words and both felt really good to meet each other, though none of them knew what to talk apart from normal hi-hello, despite the fact that they both used to talk for hours on the phone. “Imagine it’s the same feeling as you would get if you have a pen-friend with whom you are in contact for quite a long time and have exchanged and shared your personal views on various important matters of life, with whom you can really dare to be yourself, and now somehow with God’s will, you are getting a chance to meet each other and finally you both make it”.

Mashad had to meet his other friend so he went to see him and both of them decided that they would meet in office during early evening as it was quite far away from the city and as Saqi & Sadia were meeting for the first time, so they should also spend some time talking and getting to know each other in person as normal friends do. Saqi wanted to finish official work and training as fast as possible else Sadia would feel that he actually came here for official purpose and he didn’t even bother spending quality time with the person with whom he used to talk for hours. Moreover, Saqi didn’t even tell Sadia about his work so she knew that he was there just for her. All Saqi knew was that he would finish his work in a day and then he would make her sit patiently and understand everything what he always wanted to, but couldn’t ever do over the phone. He was sure that as they both respect each other so much, it would be all fine when he would tell her that they should keep their relationship limited to a good and respectful friendship. He had prayed so much for that and really looked forward to the time when he would do that, the time which didn’t now seem to be so far away as it used to. But who knew, what had destiny decided for them.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

10. Saqi's Conception

Saqi, on the other hand thought that in this trip, he would explain Sadia, that the way she thinks things are, may be, would not be productive in the long run and that she should also start to see Saqi as a good friend. There were several reasons for that and Saqi also never found it appropriate to discuss such important stuffs over the phone. The way she used to talk with him, this was all most impossible to make her explain and comprehend. He thought and was sure that when they both meet, it would be easy to make her understand things and he would manage everything and wouldn’t let her feel bad in any way. Don’t know, he just didn’t want to hurt her in any way and found that time to be most appropriate to tell her, when they both would be together. He knew this would be difficult, but somehow he had a hope that he would set everything right around her by properly and politely making her understand everything and he was sure that Sadia, in the end would understand everything and respect it. Saqi’s intensions were good and pure and all he could think was to speak the truth in front of her. All he prayed to God was to make it easy for Sadia and to just set everything right around her. Saqi too somewhere was scared as he didn’t want to lose Sadia as a good friend and couldn’t think what would be there relationship status after he tells everything to Sadia. But truth is truth and impossible often the untried; so keeping faith in God, he really looked forward to meet her till the most unexpected day came.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

9. Coincidences

It was a co-incidence that Saqi and his friend, Mashad got some work from office and had a one-day official training in the Development Center of their office branch located near to Sadia’s place. So obviously, Saqi was happy in a way that he would get to see a person whom he knows now for quite a long period of time and who has shared so many important things about her with him; a person for whom Saqi meant a lot and who has really dared to share everything personal about her life without ever seeing him in person, which he really respected. He found this official tour as a blessing in disguise because whenever Sadia used to ask him to at least come once and meet her; he was compelled to think of some reason or the other to make her forget this topic for the time being which used to result in her getting angry over him. Then Saqi was left with no option but to tell her just like that he would try to come but he somewhere knew that he hardly would ever get a chance to meet her but couldn’t ever tell her directly. That innocent voice used to be so much full of expectations that it just used to cease Saqi’s lips from saying anything that would upset her. Even Saqi wasn’t sure that he would ever meet her or not, so just saying anything pessimistic or cynical at this point was just not justified. On the other hand, her friends used to tell her that it’s her imprudence if she feels that a person to whom she just talks over the phone and hasn’t ever met, would actually come someday in real to meet her. They used to make fun of her, as to how she trusted someone by just talking over the phone, that she shared everything personal with him and how she could trust that he would ever come to meet her. So Saqi’s coming there to meet Sadia actually meant a lot to her in many ways and when he gave her the news that he would be coming there; for her, it was a moment to be treasured. Her happiness couldn’t be explained through words; it could only be felt.


A greater co-incidence was that Sadia’s birthday was falling in between at the same time when Saqi’s official trip was planned. Don’t know what God had planned. Saqi didn’t tell her that it’s his official trip and that apart from meeting her, he has a training planned and some official work too. But it was in his mind that when they would meet at her place, he would tell her that he would be a little busy with official work also and he knew that shouldn’t be a problem. It was her birthday in between, and they planned a lot many things for that. She hardly ever used to celebrate it, so this time Saqi thought that as he would also be there, so they would be having a great celebration and also he would get a chance to meet her close ones. Sadia was beyond happy and this was reflected now in their every talk. She just couldn’t express how happy she really was. She was getting prepared to see a person with whom she has talked for so long and shared so many important things of her life. She just wanted to be at her best when she meets him.

8. The Meeting Hope

Sadia wanted Saqi to at least visit her place sometime and meet her once so that they would get to know each other better and also because every time Saqi used to tell that how could they decide anything without even seeing each other in person. Saqi’s home was quite far away from his working place. Whenever once or twice in a year, he visited home, all his spare leaves used to get over with that. So his visiting Sadia’s place was actually beyond question as he hardly used to have any leave left which he would utilize for anything else or to visit her. His office schedules were so hectic that he had to even compensate hours for talking to her on phone, which he never told her only because he didn’t want Sadia to realize this in any way. Sadia was a very understanding girl and really cared for him; had he told her that he has to sit extra hours for work because of the time spent talking to her on the phone, she would have cut short her talks and wouldn’t have felt like talking and explaining all things which otherwise she felt sharing with him. She already had so many problems regarding her family and other things that he just didn’t want to add anything to it because of him. Saqi thought that it would be selfishness on his part if he told her that he really gets tired and hardly gets time to talk due to his work. He thought that at least this girl feels free speaking her heart out in front of him and his telling her these things would result in her being reluctant to talk to him. All Saqi wanted was to see her happy in every way possible and he used to do everything possible that would keep her happy.

Monday, November 24, 2008

7. Getting Along Thoughts

Sadia's every talk now used to be full of commitment while Saqi always asked her to be friends and that he always saw and sees her as a good friend which she would over hear every time. And she was so much innocent and polite in her talks that Saqi just couldn’t tell her anything rudely or straight that would just break her. He thought that maybe she is a little young at her age to decide these things and with course of time everything would be fine.

Days passed and their relationship kept strengthening. Inspite of Saqi's busy schedule and work at office, they used to talk for hours. Sadia used to tell him every bit of her day, while Saqi used to patiently listen to all strange things that used to happen around her. Right from the morning fight with parents to evening fight between them, from their parents cursing her, - to - their feeding her younger sister's ears against her, Sadia used to tell him everything that her parents used to do each day to make her life miserable knowingly or unknowingly. Even Saqi used to feel helpless at times as to what he can really do to set things right around her. All he could think was to listen patiently and talk to her so that she would feel important and try to solve her problems in every way possible apart from praying for her well being.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

6. The Quandary

Whenever Saqi, sometimes earlier just to see her mom's reaction, used to tell her, what if he has seen a girl for himself who is really good, she would appreciate it but with that she would say that at least see a family that is compatible with theirs. At Saqi's native place, much stress was given to the family as there, it was said that, “it’s not a relation between just two people; it is a relation between two families. So for a future healthy relationship, it’s very important that there should be a family compatibility.” His parents used to tell him that he is free to decide good for himself but to just see if it’s a religious sober family as theirs and used to say that they had full faith on their son that he wouldn’t ever do anything that would let his family down. All these words used to keep revolving around him which couldn’t let him take any firm decision. On one hand he used to think as to why Sadia would suffer because of her family and that she deserves nothing but the best, and on the other hand his parent's words and expectations for him couldn’t let him decide anything as of now. So Saqi could not commit anything to Sadia because he was not sure of what destiny would have decided and doesn’t want Sadia to suffer at a later point of time. He just couldn’t even think of lying to her. Saqi always thought and wanted the best for Sadia.

5. Saqi's Kin

Saqi came from quite a religious family. His parents were of utmost importance to him. He just couldn't comprehend the fact that he would ever do anything that would go against them. Saqi's parents were just like anyone would ever dream of. Always supportive and caring, they had done everything possible to make him get to a position where he is today. Everything that Saqi was as a person, it was all because of the values, love, care and support of his family. They had fulfilled his every need, whether big or small, right from his childhood till he was in a position to earn by himself. So, now when Saqi could stand on his own feet, he did not want to tell his parents anything that would upset them or make them feel that now as their son is independently living, he doesn’t care about what his parents want for him. So every time Saqi used to contemplate if he should tell about Sadia to his parents.  Sadia, as a person was perfect, loving, caring and she could do anything for Saqi as she always used to say. But her family was what used to take a toll on Saqi. They were just not compatible. Imagine a family where father still sometimes beats his kids for no reason and does not give a damn about his responsibilities towards his family.

4. Sadia & Saqi

Sadia was just an ideal kind of girl; gorgeous, beauty with brains. She was the best in whatever she did; whether it was her college work or managing all household activities. Understanding, intelligent, down to earth, the girl who would really love and respect dedicatedly from the bottom of her heart. Her talks used to be so innocent and natural. Don’t know why, how, where and what happened so unexpectedly.

Saqi was a smart, humorous, fun-loving boy; always happy and contented with what he had and life used to keep getting better for him. A responsible and God-fearing boy, his family meant the world to him. Sadia meant a lot to him too. He could not even think of any act that would disturb her. He always thought good for her and prayed for well-being of her and her family.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

3. The Mysterious Home

Sadia’s home was not what a normal person would call as a home. There were loads of problems around this innocent girl and there was none at her home with whom she can really discuss her matters or give her such kind of love. She always used to tell Saqi to take her away from hell, what she referred as her home. Don’t know, her parent’s behavior towards her was worse than what one would expect even from step-parents. There family had met with some tragedy long time back and they somehow held her responsible for that without any reason. God knows, in what world they used to live in. And she doesn’t use to share a healthy friendship with any of her friends. Saqi always used to think that why she being such a nice and kind-hearted person does not have any of good friend around. All she used to tell him is that she does not want anything in life. She does not have much expectations. Just give her a shoulder to cry. Just talk to her so she does not feel left out from this world. And with course of time he too realized that her parents are really not understanding at all. They would make her plead for pennies. She had to literally beg in front of her father to get currency in her phone or to at least buy her basic stuffs needed for a girl of her age. They didn’t recharge her phone so that she couldn’t get in touch with anyone on phone. She had to give an account of every minute spent outside her house. Everything around her was so inexplicable and mystifying.

All the time Sadia just used to tell him that at least you stay there and talk to her at least on the phone, so it was Saqi mostly who would call her every time they needed to talk. Her family was not much religious and her father hardly ever used to offer salah except for the Friday prayers. To be honest, even that was skeptical. Neither did their family share healthy relations with their neighbours nor even with their relatives. They did not even share a healthy relationship amongst themselves so relatives and neighbours were beyond question. Initially Sadia was also not that much religious but that was obvious because of the aura around her. So Saqi usually used to tell her about religion and to start praying and ask God to set everything right around her. So he made her promise that she would never skip any Salah and mostly he used to tell her its importance and the way to lead a life as taught by their religion. And with course of time Sadia became regular with Salah and now knew a lot many things about her religion and how to lead a life as per that, but still every time after the religious and other talks, Sadia used to give him a hint towards her feelings for him. Saqi, on the other hand, still was not comfortable with that and wanted to keep it just limited to a friendship and tried to slowly cut short his talks. But then the feeling that this friendly-relationship is productive in a way that at least a girl who did not know much about her religion now really cares offering salah and is now particular about it that she does not skip any of them in future, kept him talking to her. He felt that at least he should keep talking to her till she gets regular with salah and really start to comprehend that this is not for him but for God. Sadia used to pray daily now and ask God to set things right around her, and she used to feel that God has sent Saqi as a person listening to her prayers and he would set all things right around her.

But her family was just not happy with her changing behavior. Don’t know why they could not see her happy. Her father used to get angry over her for offering prayers and used to tell her not to waste her time doing that. Her parents always used to have quarrels between them for every topic whether big or small and this used to take a toll on Sadia. They even did not let her sit and talk to her younger sister who was now in her 2nd standard. So all Sadia was left with, were the walls of her house to talk with. Neither she used to get any pocket money to meet her small needs nor did she use to have a balance in her phone so that she could at least call and talk to somebody whenever she felt lonely. They had just made her life miserable to live. With such conditions around her, she used to see Saqi as a savior who would just come one day and take her out of this hell, where she was made to suffer each moment of her life. So as days passed, her possessiveness towards Saqi started increasing.

Saqi felt that this is the reason of her loving him so much in such a short period of time. Saqi used to patiently listen to her problems whether big or small and really used to feel very bad that such a sweet girl has so many problems around her. All he could do was to pray for her and her family that things become fine for all of them and asked her to do the same. But this was not all what Sadia wanted. She wanted to see a Saqi, committed to her, though she did not say that but she wanted to know whether Saqi really loved her or not. Saqi, on the other hand, respected her a lot and could not think to speak anything that would hurt her feelings. He used to think that this girl has so many problems around her and if he speaks something of which he himself would not be sure, that would just break her heart. He used to think and pray for a day when everything around Sadia would be fine. He thought that the reason for Sadia to love him so much at this time is obvious as she gets a person who listens to her problems and tries to solve it and prays for her well-being. She gets a person to speak her heart-out, everything that she used to keep within herself and wanted to speak to anyone close to her. She found Saqi as a person in front of whom she can cry and feel lighter and who would really take care of her. So Saqi felt that they both should give this relationship some more time and wouldn’t think about commitment matters least till Sadia’s studies get over. He just could not think of anything that would upset this sweet girl who just has started to offer salah and started feeling things around her better.

Every time he thought to speak anything that would go against what Sadia wants, something stopped him as he thought this would really upset this girl who has just started to see world with a much better perspective, who has just started to learn about her religion because of him, who has just started to love things around her because of him.

2. Feelings Upside-Down

Saqi always saw a good friend in her while with course of time, Sadia started to love him. Initially Saqi did not even understand the implied meaning of her talks and changed behavior, mostly because he used to remain quite busy with his office work and couldn’t understand that how a girl whom he knows just for a week or two, could even have such type of feelings for him. Initially Sadia also didn't express anything but this thing that Saqi really cannot understand the implied meaning of her talks, used to irritate her and she often used to get angry over him for not giving time to understand her. But for Saqi the truth was that he always looked at her as a very good friend and wanted her to reciprocate the same, which Sadia always hated. Most of the times, they fought over the same issue. Whenever Sadia used to tell him that can she tell one important thing to him, Saqi used to say, "a bomb is awaited ;)" and used to ask her something different that would just divert the topic for the time being. This helped for a month after which things really used to get worse if Saqi did not respond positively to her serious talks. And finally one day Sadia clearly told Saqi that she has got feelings for him and that she really loved him from the bottom of her heart, and asked him if he feels the same. Her voice had such expectations and hope within, that compelled Saqi not to deny anything. But he really did not want to make a commitment at this time as he considered that it’s not an appropriate age for these things. Sadia was in 3rd year of her bachelor’s degree course and Saqi had just got over from his degree and worked in a software company as a web designer. He felt that may be this is childish on her part to commit such an important decision of her life at this age, when studies and many other things should have been at a higher priority for her. They have not ever met once, so Saqi used to tell her that she should give this relationship some more time so that they both would get to know each other better and they can be friends at least for the time being, and that they would later see if her feelings would remain the same over the course of time. Saqi used to think that how can a girl fall in love with him without even seeing him in person. He just did not want to give her false commitment or lie to her in any way that would break her heart later. So he always used to tell her that let us stay as good friends, but Sadia always used to over-hear this part. Many times she got angry only listening to the fact that Saqi considers her just as a good friend. She just couldn’t comprehend the fact that Saqi does not have any such feelings for her.

Friday, November 21, 2008

1. Opening Impressions

It was a Sunday evening and as usual Saqi was busy with his coding practices. Just to take a break amidst, while browsing that night, he came through this profile of a girl named Syed Sadia. He still asks this question to himself as to why he sent a friend request to her; may be he loved that name. But to be really honest, he still does not know, mostly because Saqi was not a kind of person who would squander his time browsing to someone’s profile and then asking for a friendship. But after all what has to happen, happens. So Saqi, not even waiting or expecting any reply, got along with his usual mundane chores that used to keep him quite busy and contented. It was the coming Friday evening and the day was really hectic for Saqi. It was closing time of a project so he usually used to return late from office. It was that night, when he saw a reply from Sadia, a simple "hi" and complimenting some pictures of his native place in his profile. So things kind of started to get along for both of them right from the beginning. Scrapping started between them and Sadia seemed to be a nice girl to him. Just after a day, both started chating and mostly it used to get along for hours and both started to get to know each other. Both exchanged their pics and Sadia though really worried and hoping that this guy would keep her pics safe, even messaged him once that she has full faith in him and she trusted that he would keep her pics safe. She was such an innocent girl. Sadia was really a beautiful girl and both loved to chat with each other. She sometimes used to pick some strange topics about country matters and world-wide terrorism and asked Saqi to give his view on the same, though in real she was not a kind of person who actually cared for that. Later she told Saqi that her friends asked her to check his views on these matters so that they would get to know his personal views or if his thoughts are biased towards some particular thing. Still don’t know what was in their mind or what they wanted to figure out with that. Saqi was not the kind of person who would let himself get involved in such talks but then he had to speak something now when he was asked to. He found explaining such stuffs to her a little difficult through chats, so he asked for her mobile number and called her. Ahh..!! Her sweet voice was like a ten year old kid and as she was a little scared to begin, Saqi tried to make her as comfortable on phone as possible. It could be easily figured out that even she was not a kind of person who would really like to talk about such matters or even cared for these things and that someone has really compelled her to ask for this. Her initial say hearing to Saqi's voice was that he is a rude type of boy with arrogance and attitude which however turned to be quite different later, but that is a different part of the story. There was some kind of pureness in her voice that kept Saqi talking to her and of course with the course of time, she too loved talking to him.